


Pieces of You

by freakofnature



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Drabble Collection, HQAngstWeek2020, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-03
Updated: 2020-11-04
Packaged: 2021-03-08 21:32:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,883
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27373501
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/freakofnature/pseuds/freakofnature
Summary: Drabble Collection written for HQAngstWeek2020
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio
Kudos: 6





	1. Day 1: Only Time Will Tell

**Author's Note:**

> I have no notes? this is un-beta'd because we die like men here. 
> 
> all of this is angst and if anything turns for the worst, the chapters will be tagged accordingly~

Pressing a hand to his chest, Shouyou feels the beat of his heart against his palm, the uneven thud a horrid reminder of the adrenaline running through his veins. His dinner lays untouched on the coffee table, a glass of water tipped over, liquid steadily dripping onto the muted grey rug beneath.

It is here, frozen on the couch, that Shouyou blinks back tears. The silence of the apartment was once a comfort to him, a break from his hectic day to day life. Yet now, Shouyou flinches as the air condition kicks on, the gentle flow of cool air making his once homey apartment seem desolate.

Lonely.

A foreign feeling, loneliness. Shouyou had been alone before, like any other human being, there were days where being alone was more healing than even the best cuddles with his boyfriend.

But, Shouyou couldn’t remember the last time he felt _lonely_. Maybe his first year of high school, not too long before he met Tobio. Maybe he was lonely then, but looking back on it, Shouyou doesn’t think the loneliness of his youth can compare to _now_ , to the heavy weight of silence pressing down on his skin where there was, only hours before, light— _life_.

A long time coming, Tobio had told him, his face impassive as it always has been. Before, Shouyou could read between the lines, could figure out what the twinkling in Tobio’s eyes _meant_ , what the turn of his lips said where words failed them. For years, decades even, Shouyou had been a master at reading the body language of his best friend, of his boyfriend, of the man who Shouyou wouldn’t hesitate to call his soulmate.

But tonight, Shouyou couldn’t place the expression on Tobio’s face. _A long time coming_ , Tobio told him just hours ago, fingers rotating the thin golden band on his finger. _This isn’t working out anymore_ , Tobio had continued, the stars that once lived in the depths of his eyes no longer visible to Shouyou.

Where did it go wrong? Shouyou wishes he knew the answer, wishes Tobio had sat them down ages ago, wishes that he could have fixed this, fixed _them_ before it reached this point.

It’s funny how if this conversation had happened years ago, it would have ended in slamming doors and bruises against skin, careless hands gripping too tight, too desperate. When did they change?

There is no right answer for this, Shouyou knows. It could have been the career change, the promotions that slowly stretched the distance between Shouyou and Tobio, unnoticed until it was too late. It could have been a number of things, small things that accumulated until it reached a point of no return. Shouyou will never find the true catalyst, never will find the reason why Tobio held his hand for the last time, eyes unreadable, lips thinned as his throat worked—to hold back tears, maybe.

Shouyou doesn’t know when growing together led to growing _apart_ , will never know when change no longer was beneficial to them staying together.

But he will know that Tobio loved him until the end, that this was as hard for him as it will be for Shouyou to wrap his head around. Maybe in a few years, they will find each other again, wounds healed.

One day, Shouyou hopes, pulling his hand away from his chest, unfurling his fist to stare at a single golden band in the middle of his palm, maybe one-day Tobio will take this back.


	2. Day 2+3: Together

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma remembers the day he closed the door to their shared apartment for the last time, he knew it was going to go downhill from there.   
> It was then, Kenma struggled with the knowledge that one day he would lose Kuroo.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Day 2 + 3 for HQAngstWeek2020 
> 
> i said 'keep this under 1k' and then proceeded to not do that but i DID manage to combine 2 days so I'm gonna say that was the plan all along. 
> 
> also drabbles are hard....i do not enjoy writing them but they are so much easier to post then the monster fics i always plan...a struggle.

“Kenma,” Kuroo says, face blurring for a moment as he moves across the room. Even still, Kenma cannot pretend that the smile visible on Kuroo’s face doesn’t make the gooseflesh crawl down his arms. The camera stills, focusing once again on Kuroo’s blinding grin, a shock of orange hair in the bottom corner of the screen. “Meet Shouyou.”

Orange, is the first thought Kenma has, eyes slowly taking in the second man—a younger man—on the screen, cheek pressed too casually against Kuroo’s. Thief, is Kenma’s second thought, a snarl curling in his gut. Careful to keep his face as blank as always, Kenma pictures the idea of removing this _Shouyou_ from Kuroo’s life as clean-cut as possible.

He should have never let his best friend—his proclaimed _soulmate_ —move down to Kyoto for work. They’ll stay in touch, Kuroo had promised three years ago, they’ll make it work.

Promises broken almost immediately as without Kenma’s ever-present possessiveness keeping Kuroo as _his_ , Kuroo has dated more in these past three years than he ever did in their high school and college years _combined_.

It’s a bitter feeling, hearing Kuroo talk about his conquests. A one night stand here, a steady flight there, and every so often a relationship. Kenma always listened, fingers numb as he battled the emotions of elation of Kuroo always— _always_ —returning to him, but soured to know that Kuroo was no longer his. His best friend, his soulmate, his safety net. Kenma’s only solace was that Kuroo never mentioned these people by name, and only once did Kenma ever come across an image of one of Kuroo’s exes

Once upon a time, it was mutual, their dependency. Caught between parents in a loveless marriage, Kuroo always sought Kenma out, wounds hidden so well to the untrained eye.

Yet, Kenma always saw, always was ready to let Kuroo crawl into his bed, to ask his parents if Kuroo could stay longer.

They made it out of their small town, only a few hours from Tokyo, in college, working tooth and nail for a dingy apartment with a perpetual sink leak that caused the entire place to smell like mildew no matter how much Kuroo and Kenma cleaned.

They were happier then, newly freed from an oppressive town that turned their backs on Kuroo when he needed them most. Kenma, though in good standing with his family, never once asked them for help, content in the knowledge that they let him leave without a fight. Maybe they were overworked, underpaid, and constantly struggling between paying bills, food, and securing a savings account, but at least they were _happy_.

And then Kenma found a better job, a ghostwriter for a magazine that was more than just gossip columns. And then Kuroo got promoted, from a simple office worker to a manager. The money came easier, bills were no longer at the cost of them foregoing dinner, and they were able to afford a better apartment.

One that didn’t reek of mildew and rot.

But Kuroo kept getting promoted over the years, and Kenma’s job wanted him to move closer to their office to cut back on commute time.

And then Kuroo got an offer three years ago, a regional manager; the catch that it was in Kyoto.

Kenma remembers the day he closed the door to their shared apartment for the last time, he knew it was going to go downhill from there.

It was then, Kenma struggled with the knowledge that one day he would lose Kuroo.

But, honestly? He didn’t think it would be this soon.

“Hi!” the camera shifts to show more of this orange blob attached to Kuroo’s side, hazel eyes blinking rapidly as this so-called _boyfriend_ adjusts Kuroo’s phone in his hands. “Nice to finally meet you, Kenma!”

Kenma notes, distaste coloring every thought, that this man was at least cute. His voice wasn’t too deep, his eyes bright—like Kenma’s, though a tough browner—and his smile…

Just based on looks alone, Kenma hates that Shouyou simply didn’t have any flaws.

“Hello, nice to meet you.” Kenma keeps his words as toneless as possible, briefly wondering if he feigned his phone dying if Kuroo would never show this unwanted nuisance to Kenma ever again. “I didn’t know you were dating anyone, Kuroo.”

The camera pans over to show Kuroo running a hand through his hair, lips pulling into a sheepish smile. Kenma is both endeared and wondering if science has progressed far enough to reach the distance between them so he can strangle his friend with his bare hands. “Yeah, it’s been—what?—almost a year now? Nine months, I think. But Shouyou was overseas for a while, so I never got the chance to introduce you two!”

Kenma feels the polite curl of his lips freeze in place, mind grinding to a halt. Almost a year? _A year_. Why was this Shouyou never mentioned before, at least in passing? Were they growing apart to the point where Kenma was no longer on Kuroo’s radar of telling him things?

He had hoped, so viciously, that Kuroo would realize he was as lonely as Kenma was without him, that Kuroo would return to him, would wrap Kenma up in his arms and promise to never leave again. Kenma never planned for their relationship to edge further than the mutual codependency they have always had, but there were days where he wished Kuroo would call him randomly—not like the scheduled Facetime worked around their work-life—and confess his love.

Foolish, truly, but Kenma was only human.

But now Kuroo went and moved to Kyoto, leaving Kenma hundreds of kilometers away. Now, only three years later, he has a _boyfriend_. Of a year?

Kuroo’s laughter pulled Kenma from his thoughts, eyes focusing just for a moment as he watches Shouyou sneak a kiss to Kuroo’s cheek before walking off-screen. With barely concealed horror, Kenma notices the way Kuroo’s cheeks warm, the dopey smile he tosses in the direction Shouyou disappeared to shattering the last of Kenma’s hopes.

Hopes that one day, they would share an apartment again; a shared space filled with warm memories and deep-seated happiness, just like their first apartment in the dingiest parts of Tokyo.

 _Why wasn’t I enough for you?_ Kenma wants to ask. He had given Kuroo everything, a family, a home, a friend. A soulmate.

He was Kuroo’s so much as Kuroo was _his_.

Kenma never thought himself greedy, just worked to maintain a status quo, a prayer that it would forever remain unchanged.

Yes, it was Kuroo who got greedy, who wanted more than Kenma’s _everything_ , who wished for bigger and better things instead of settling for the nice home he could have made together. Just him and Kenma, that’s all Kuroo really needed.

“I think soon, I’ll ask him to move in with me.” Kuroo confides in Kenma, his voice pitched low as to not alert his boyfriend.

Kenma smiles, corners of his eyes crinkling as he does so. “Tell me how it goes,” he says between the steady beat of his heart. “He’s stupid if he says no.” Kenma swallows the lump in his throat, hand clutching his phone a little tighter as he watches the way Kuroo throws his head back and laughs, tension Kenma hadn’t even noticed melting off his shoulders.

He was never going to be enough, was he?

Still, Kenma decides, unease curling tight in his chest, he would not lose this. He would give an inch, but this Shouyou would not take Kuroo from him, not entirely.

Kenma could afford to lose him, not now, not ever.

And as Kenma bids goodbye to Kuroo, his finger pressing _End Call_ , he hopes that Kuroo doesn’t want to lose him either.


End file.
